#StayHome Journal Ep.2: Hygge and the Pursuit of Happiness During a Pandemic
Quarantine day 40 something…how u holdin up?
I was inside one day wondering how to spend my day, my mundane day at home, feeling sorry for myself and wondering just how we got into this mess of a pandemic. My travel plans, career plans, dating plans are all put on pause. Then again, after thinking about those frontline workers, medical workers, risking their own lives to save another got me thinking that I should stop complaining and feel lucky, do something productive, and it's this endless loop of thoughts I am in.
Ultimately what I’m wondering is, all I have to do is stay at home, it’s simple as that but why is it so hard and stressful?
Then, I recalled this book my friend recommended me to, The Little Book of Hygge: The Danish Way to Live Well. This blog post will be heavily inspired by this and my personal research on Hygge, a Danish lifestyle that leads to happiness from the inside of your houses.
In the winter of Denmark, after you’ve had your 3pm snack, you can look outside and realize it’s already gotten dark. Daylight hours in the winter of Denmark is known to be extremely short and you have to know, winter is long in Denmark starting from October going down to March. This naturally means Danish people spend a lot of time in their households. Denmark is also known to be one of the happiest countries in the world. According to the 2019 happiness report, Denmark ranked second, right after Finland (source). So what makes Danish people so happy, even though they spend a lot of their time at home? and is there anything we can take away from this, to make our quarantine lives a bit happier?
The Hygge Manifesto
The book I mentioned earlier, explores “Hygge” a Danish “chill” lifestyle that possibly could be the reason for this phenomenon and I’ve extracted bits that I personally have adapted to my quarantine as the Hygge Manifesto. Nobody has conducted a research on my happiness, but I can subjectively say, my relationship with the given situation has slowly come to ease and I find myself slowly embracing this new life style at home.
I think originally in the book there were eight points to the manifesto, but here are five I especially found easy to bring into my everyday quarantine life and I will explore further in this blog post of each category.
1. ATMOSPHERE
2. Presence
3. pleasure
4. Harmony & Truce
5. Togetherness
1. ATMOSPHERE - Set the tone -
・Candles (Levende lys: Living lights)
The golden hour is that beautiful hour of the day right before sunrise and sunset. The sky turns multiple colors all at once, as if a painter using the sky as its canvas.
Create your own golden hour at home. Turn down the lights and light the candles. In Denmark, people burn more candles per head than anywhere else in Europe, and they don’t just light one candle but several at once, creating that atmosphere of the golden hour full of peace, calmness and beauty within your household.
By the way, if you are an environmentalist as I am, try buying the soy candles. A lot of candles sold in Japan are usually made from paraffin wax, a byproduct of petroleum refining which is incredibly damaging to both human and earth. As an alternative I always try to buy soy candles. Soy candles are also damaging in some sense but according to my personal research, this seemed the best out of the options. You can find mine here on amazon. It’s mandarin, basil and lime flavored, around 7000 yen but also bigger than my face.
・Artwork & Flowers
This is a personal thing I do, so I’m not sure if it’s part of hygge but I put up artworks and flowers around my room. Before my current job, I used to work at a creative agency called TokyoDex. We had a number of services but one of our main was to incorporate artworks, murals into work spaces. I remember the founder, my boss telling me how artwork creates dialogue in the workspace. Some people might like it, some people might think otherwise but the important thing is that narrative of feelings, and expressing those feelings to one another. That conversation may lead to something more. I think the same could be said for your personal space as well. By having artwork, it allows you to think and feel, maybe subconsciously, and that can create a whole wider mindset for you and your day.
I buy small flowers and plants at a local shop and also hang post cards and pictures as well. My favorite artwork in my room is a picture by Ulysses Aoki, a dear friend and an amazing photographer. (Instagram, YouTube)
・Wake up at 5 am
Setting the atmosphere is something actionable and might sound like the easiest thing, but I can definitely say from experience that sometimes it’s the most difficult. I moved out of my mom’s house just before things got serious with Covid-19. However, I was already working from home at the time, spending my weekends at home and it was extremely stressful for both of us, my mom and I. She would have personal items in my room, so would have to come in, and just that small interference could trigger to a small fight. Especially now, my heart goes out to those who are living in households that for whatever reason, they would rather not be home. My small advice, would be to wake up at 5 am. 5 am is a magical time of day, when not many people in your world are awake. You feel this calmness, stillness, your own place separate from the rest of the world and its activities. By being active during this time and doing whatever you want, sets the tone for the rest of the day I would say.
2. PRESENCE - Let your mind + body be there -
・Turn off your phone / Set timer for social media usage
My relationship with my phone is constantly a work in progress. In this digital age, we are never alone. Holding on to our phones, we are constantly connected to society. LAUV called this modern loneliness.
Although at times through this quarantine, I have been nothing but appreciative of this allowing me to contact my friends, be kept up to date on what other people are doing, it has also been somewhat in the way of me connecting to my inner self. I applaud people who are able to respond quickly at any given time, be there for their friends when they are needed. Especially this might be a characteristic of extroverts, who attain energy by talking to external people. As an introvert, it is emotionally draining to have my phone buzz in the middle of me time, where I am in my own safe, secure place.
At first I didn’t realize this, and instead blamed myself for being really bad at replying and not being there for people when they needed me, but ever since I’ve connected that to my introvert-ness, things have gotten easier. I turn off my phone for a few hours in the middle of the day and also have set a timer on my usage for social media. Especially in quarantine, when we’re always at home, it’s very difficult to balance and distinguish that time of emotionally being social and by yourself, so I found this practice to be very helpful.
・Meditate
Again, this is not something that was written in the book as part of hygge but meditation has really helped with my mental wellbeing in the given situation. Even before quarantine I had started using HeadSpace, an online meditation app and now take online yoga classes once a week by Yuki-san. After going to India and practicing yoga there, I realized how important it is to spend as little as 15 minutes of the day completely to yourself.
“There’s a huge difference of having to use your body, your heart, your mind 24/7 without any breaks, whereas with religion, it enforces all of us to stop and free our minds, do our hearts and bodies a favor and let them rest. " - a quick sentence from my blog post I wrote on Ashram. (Link here)
I think we live in a rather altruistic society where people are constantly checking up (sometimes nosy) on other people but never really focus on themselves. Take some time out of your day, for you.
3. PLEASURE - Indulge! -
・Bake cookies
“Indulgence“ is one of my favorite words in the English vocabulary. Give into your desires and take that extra sugar! In Denmark, there is a high level of meat, confectionary and coffee consumption. For example, the annual consumption of sweets in Denmark is 8.2kg whereas the average European would be 4.1kg. Hygge is about being kind to yourself, and giving yourself a treat. It doesn’t necessarily mean, treat yourself to an expensive dinner but it’s more about allowing yourself to take a break from the healthy lifestyle. So bake those cookies with the extra time you have, eat that chocolate cake and have that meaty steak you’ve always wanted to have with butter.
・Make Matcha drinks!
Definitely not apart of an official hygge practice but recently I’ve equipped a new hobby which is matcha. The act of slowly melting the matcha powder while mixing it with a Chasen (mixing tool) made out of bamboo, is extremely relaxing. Once I’ve melted the powder with hot boiled water, I pour into soy milk and add in a bit of honey as well.
During this quarantine I’ve also realized that it goes well with lemonade, as well as gin. Definitely recommended for your indulgence of the day. (Matcha is actually quite healthy though so not really indulgence haha)
4. HARMONY & TRUCE - We are equal -
This is not something actionable but more of a mindset. Quite simply, there is no need to brag, argue, because everybody likes you already.
Do what makes you happy and don’t compare.
5. TOGETHERNESS - Stay connected -
・Write letters & call your friends
Who says writing letters is not a thing anymore? After entering quarantine, I can say with pride that I have started writing letters again. Unlike short messages, letters allow you to give long updates on how you are doing, and there’s something calming and kind about taking a pen and paper, jotting down words for a specific someone. Quarantine can feel extremely lonely sometimes especially if you’re living alone, but take that extra time and stay connected.
・Write down journals
A sense of togetherness doesn’t necessarily have to be with someone else. Coming from someone who’s traveled around countries by herself, I can give you advice to befriend yourself. Talk to yourself, write down your thoughts. When you actually put into words what you are feeling, you start building a stronger relationship and understanding of yourself, your traits, your personality. Those understandings will help you make better action items and choices useful not only in this situation but here on. This is probably one of the reasons I have started writing this blog as well.
These are notes I took when I was reading the book about hygge. Also, excuse my dirty coffee cup.
All in all…
Hygge is about an atmosphere and an experience rather than about things. It’s a sense of security, chillness, calmness and a peace of mind. Hopefully, my takeaways can help you find your own way of hygge in this lifestyle as well:)
Stay safe and stay home!